After my fourth child at 29, life became much more hectic. Remembering to take my contraceptive pill each day at the same time was challenging because there was always some distraction.

I opted for the Mirena Coil after failing to get on well with the contraceptive implant. The coil suited me and my lifestyle much better at that time in my life, and it worked well. I didn’t have any pain having it fitted, but I think after four children, I had learnt how to relax my body when needed. Going in with a clear understanding of the procedure, controlling my breathing, and chatting with the nurse made the experience easier.

Very quickly, my periods ceased. As strange as it may sound, I wasn’t completely comfortable with that. They made me feel womanly and reassured me that my body was working the way it should. Without periods, I noticed that my PMS would wind up but not dissipate, leaving me irritable and often depressive for far longer than I thought normal.

Years passed, and we decided to grow our family. When I wanted my coil removed, it took weeks for an appointment. When my appointment finally came around, the nurse couldn’t find my coil strings. I ended up having an ultrasound to locate them and remember being terrified it might have ravaged my womb. Thankfully, all was well, and it was removed easily and painlessly.

Not having the responsibility of contraception again for a while was wonderful. Once our baby arrived, my periods did not return for a long time as I was exclusively breastfeeding on demand. Everything felt natural though. Eventually, for convenience, I had another coil fitted. A few years later, when we wanted to conceive, there was no appointment for five weeks, and the strings could not be located a second time!

Everything turned out okay, and we conceived our sixth child. For some reason I cannot explain, more out of routine habit than anything else, I went back for more! Each time the coil was implanted, my usually manageable PMS became much worse and lasted far longer than it should.

I began talking to Mr Lemon about my feelings towards contraception now that I was getting older. I had been on some form or another since I was 15 years old, only breaking when I was pregnant or breastfeeding. I knew there were increased risks of breast cancer with hormonal birth control. But there were two other things really bothering me.

The first was that as I was heading towards perimenopause and had the coil fitted, I might have it taken out one day to realise I had actually menopaused. I recently had a blood test to check for perimenopause because I had experienced signs: sweats, breakthrough bleeding, moods, hair and skin issues, lightheadedness, forgetfulness, difficulty sleeping, and itchy legs at night.

When the tests came back clear, I was dubious and I told the doctor that if it wasn’t perimenopause, then I was concerned my coil’s efficiency was waning. This brings me to the second concern.

When I had my first coil fitted, it was licensed for three years. The second time, it was five. After four years, my smear test was due, and the nurse told me the license had now been extended to 8 years. I thought my old one would be taken out and a new 8 year one put in, but no. Apparently, the existing one was to stay in. I wasn’t happy with that at all, but there wasn’t anything I could do about it at my smear appointment. Six months later, I had breakthrough bleeding and other symptoms. Queue my perimenopause test and coil questions for the doctor.

After being brushed off and told “to monitor things,” I was feeling fed up. I felt like my body was being held hostage, but it was me that had allowed it. I began researching Natural Birth Control methods. I knew this could work for me, and I would be quite strict and regimented with monitoring my cycles. All of my children were planned, and a planned pregnancy was not what I wanted. Life is moving on, and I knew that having or not having a baby was not what this was about.

I wanted to finally get to know my temperament unaltered. To experience being a woman without hormonal intervention. Not ruling out the possibility I may benefit from HRT at some point, but to walk into perimenopause having experienced being a woman who wasn’t trying to be or not be pregnant. To be one who was finally just being me.

One evening, I was in a particularly low mood. I had some bleeding two days before and had enquired about having the coil taken out with the GP. Weeks, they said. I felt quite miserable. Mr Lemon was away, and I was sick of feeling rubbish and depressed. For two or three hours, I deliberated and finally worked up some courage to simply do myself what the nurse would do.

I went into the bathroom and took a deep breath. I located those bitchy little kite strings. Ever so gently, I freed my body from the effects of the coil, asserted my right to choose, and reclaimed my authentic self. It was incredibly empowering and liberating. Taking charge of my body and fertility once more. Stepping away from hormonal contraception has been very good for me. I no longer feel like I am being controlled or doing what is expected of me rather than what feels right.

Of course, if I don’t want to become pregnant, I have to be careful. Being in a long-term and secure partnership means I do not have to worry about STDs. I have been monitoring my cycles closely and was relieved that my menses returned quickly. It is fascinating to notice all the ways in which my body naturally tells me it is fertile and when I am ovulating. No longer does my PMS go on and on. My moods generally have improved. I no longer feel desperate and desolate for no reason at certain times of the month. I am less irritable, but when I am, I know why, depending on what day of my cycle I’m on.

Coincidentally, many of the other symptoms I was experiencing have eased or disappeared too. I will never know for sure if my coil’s effectiveness was waning or if it was unsuitable for me all along. I felt it were playing a part in altering my mental well-being and don’t intend to have another inserted again! What I do know is that once I removed it, I felt an immediate sense of relief and that since then, I feel calmer. I appear to be having fewer disputes and feelings of despair.

I feel like I have wind in my sails, and I’m steering my own ship towards a wonderfully bright age. Womanhood is truly extraordinary.

MEDICAL DISCLAIMER – All content and information on this website is for informational purporses only. I am not an expert on YOUR body nor am I medically trained in any way. I am writing about my experience as it happened to me, involving my own body.  No material on this site is intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health care provider with any questions you may have regarding your health, medical condition or treatment. Never delay seeking medical advice because of something you have read on this website.

© 2024 Juliette Proffitt

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